RESPECT YOURSELF AND OTHERS WILL RESPECT YOU

RESPECT YOURSELF AND OTHERS WILL RESPECT YOU

(Confucius)

   Somehow, somewhere in the growing up process I started putting myself last. By the time dinner was on the table and I sat down, everyone was done and up. Ok, I didn't teach them right or prep meals in a very timely fashion. By the time kids were brought home from sports, fed, bathed, and homework done, I was too tired to do anything for me but plop on the couch and think I was watching TV.  By the time friends, family and functions were attended to, too late for me. 

   I made those choices that got me all riled up and out of balance.  I got resentful and bitter.  When all the while all I had to do was put me first.  But I turned to various substances to get through the seemingly endless and grueling tasks.  Seemed to take the edge off and keep me from feeling overwhelmed. Again, when all the while all I had to do was put me first.

   A very valuable lesson I've learned in recovery is that sobriety comes first. Without sobriety there is no nothing (excuse my grammar).  There's no Dee, no family, no job, no home, no nothing.  And without a doubt, there ain't no self-respect.  And isn't it funny that when I put myself first and I'm happy, everybody else is okay too and everything seems to fall into place...just the way it's supposed to.  So one day at a time I'm learning to put myself first, to feel worthy of good things that happen, to love myself, to respect myself.

   Yesterday I retired from Safeway after being a checker over 19 years.  I didn't expect anything (no expectations; no disappointments…another valuable lesson learned in recovery) but a sincere good-bye and good luck from my co-workers. But I was emotionally surprised at the farewell I was given!  A beautiful orchid lei, a bouquet of flowers, cake and homemade cookies, cards, gifts, hugs and tears!

   Had I not respected myself and learned to love  myself, I truly don't believe I would have gained the respect and love from my co-workers last night.  How beautiful is that?  How simple is that. Love and respect yourself!  You're worthy!

   So today I start a new chapter in my life.  Another gift in sobriety. I get to be my own boss.  Work hard and long hours for me.  I get to live my passion.  Now I go full force with my new web-based business, Deesigns By Harris, at DeesignsByHarris.com.  I get to create and sell stained glass gifts, focusing on gifts in recovery.  I get to give back what was so freely given to me when I needed it most...hope!

   Until next Monday, Aloha and have a mighty fine day!  Your choice!